Kinky and filthy things that have happened to us, all explicitly told

Month: March 2020

The Best Laid Plans

I don’t remember the government’s guidance on controlling the spread of the Coronavirus including women having to have their cunts licked for well over an hour a day. Victoria is insistent it is worth a try.

My husband is taking the “wash your hands” message to extremes, insisting he thoroughly washes my and Vicki’s cunts, asses, and tits on a daily basis. We must seriously have the cleanest tits in the country – I can guarantee there is no Coronavirus on them, given the amount of time he has spent lathering and then rinsing them off. He similarly lathers our ass cheeks, and we have to bend over to allow him to lather right down the crack and focus on cleaning our assholes. Then while we are bent over, he carefully ensures (from behind) that our cunts, and particularly the folds of our cunt flaps and the hoods around our clits are thoroughly clean. His attention to detail is exemplary.

It has turned into a running joke that anything and everything sexual was to help with Coronavirus. In these days where most of the country has shut down with no end in sight, I think you have to raise a smile. Of course, neither of those things above helps with Coronavirus. None of us want to make light of the current problems, but we three feel we need to make the best of it and keep a smile if we can.

Other than for food shopping, we have been isolating ourselves for a week now. Vicki isn’t staying away in hotels at all, my work has been suspended and my husband is working from home all the time. We therefore have a lot more time on our hands and are using the opportunity to further sort out the flat and of course to fuck more. You expected that, right?

The question of whether we should be having physical contact with each other came up. Obviously, we all live together, so we can still congregate in our flat, and as none of us are in the vulnerable category, government advice is that we can still fuck and have bodily contact. Bloody good job: to be honest, I would struggle not having bodily contact, which is why we came up with our rules for fucking even if one of us has a cold.

Because I am susceptible to viruses, we have been doing all the good hygiene the government is now advising for years (and have barely had a cold because of it). We’ve added in showers immediately when we get home, but apart from that, we think our hygiene record has been proven over the years, so we are going to carry on fucking and having other bodily contact.

I know for some people; social isolation feels like a fate worse than death. They just seem to be incapable of it, but it is absolutely necessary. I have to admit I much prefer dinner parties to pubbing and clubbing these days, but even our dinner parties have been cancelled. We had a party planned for Easter with Laura, Nikki, and their partners – the first such party of the year and way too long since our last party.

We had decided to base the party on some Easter related silliness that my husband and I had done over the years. We have tried a number of things involving eggs, bunnies, and chocolate, and we planned to share a number of the things that worked at the party. Inserting Flakes one-by-one into my cunt and then eating them directly out was what my husband did to me the first Easter that we were together. We’ve also placed Flakes between my ass cheeks and tits, and in all three locations, he has both eaten them directly off me quickly and allowed them to melt a little first. We had ordered a big catering pack of Flakes for the party.

You can use chocolate eggs, like Creme Eggs or Caramel Eggs in a similar way to Flakes. My favourite use for such as egg is placing it between my ass cheeks over my asshole, and letting it melt a lot (with body heat, that doesn’t take long), then having him lick it all out of my crack and cleaning my asshole. My husband also loves inserting one just inside my cunt, leaving it for a good while to melt and then licking my cunt clean.

We’ve found that if you cut the end of one such egg (best done when cold), you can mount it on the end of his cock, with the fondant or caramel sticking to his glans (best done when warm). This is by far the best way to eat such eggs, as you not only get the egg, but you also have to lick it all clean off his glans as well. We’re rather fond of that. We had a load of these eggs in stock too for the party.

One final thing for chocolate is something we started doing a couple of years ago. We have a hollow chocolate egg that needs breaking; we unwrap it; he holds it point up with the other end on a surface (e.g., a plate or tray resting on a chair), I spread my ass cheeks nudge the point against my asshole, he stops holding the egg, and then I sit down, crushing the egg in the process. We’ve found if the egg is cold, it breaks with a minimal amount sticking to my ass. If the egg is warm, rather more of sticks to my ass, and therefore he takes a long time to eat it all off my ass. Both are good, which you do just depends on what you want to do at the time. We had a number of nice hollow eggs in stock too.

Over the years (really working tenuous and cheesy Easter links), we’ve added a few props to our Easter fun. A few years ago, he bought a bunny tail butt plug and matching bunny ears, which I wear for increasing amounts of time over Easter. We definitely were including those in the party – all female participants were going to get their own.

They were also going to get their own yoni eggs, roughly egg-shaped vaginal weights. The ones we had selected were symmetrical and made of glass and were extra-large, meaning our cunts would get a workout. You can use them for Kegel exercises, but I found it is really lovely to just have one inside your cunt and to try to keep it in. I’ve had mine for a year, and I’ve started going out with it in, like I sometimes do with butt plugs; it is a really exhilarating activity. But for the party, we had decided that the female guests would each arrive with one in place, and then keep inserting and removing them as necessary. This party was going to be a real challenge for our cunts.

Of course, we can’t leave out rabbit sex toys, which we were going to use quite a number of, including a particularly vicious mains-powered one that Vicki owns that we were going to use to finish off all the poor clits at the party. It is a monster that rarely gets used, but it was going to be closing act for each woman of the evening and was a real challenge for our clits.

I’m getting horny just writing about our plans, but sadly they are partially on hold. We have rightly cancelled the party, but my husband, Vicki and I are going to have fun with this stuff over Easter, and the whole group will get together once this is all over, hopefully before all the chocolate goes out of date!

The Inevitable Drift Towards Polyamory

In the days after I had realised that I was madly in love with Victoria and still madly in love with my husband, I had little sleep, as I imagined a wonderful situation where Victoria lived with us full time, where she was an equal partner in our relationship, where we got to all love each other, as well as all fuck each other frequently and mercilessly.

I knew there was a good chance that I was heading for a fall. I knew it wasn’t all that likely to work out like I imagined. After all, how likely is it for us to find someone who genuinely and whole-heartedly wants to fuck both of us, let alone that that someone would change her mind (from not wanting a relationship at all to wanting in on a polyamorous one). Still, I dreamed and wanked about it. I couldn’t help it. I was so excited.

I started reading up on all things polyamorous, to prepare myself for the conversations that lay ahead, and also to understand more about what I might be getting into. And there was a lot to take in.

One thing that is very clear is that it isn’t a quick decision to make, nor was it an easy one. Not many polyamorous relationships make it past early days, and the last thing I wanted was to ruin what we had. There are many pitfalls, much to discuss and many plans to be made.

When my husband and me decided to get married, it wasn’t a grand gesture, a lavish proposal on a beach in Tahiti or flashing on a stadium scoreboard. It wasn’t even a down on one knee thing. It was just a conversation where I mentioned we should probably get married and my husband said, yes, I think we should. Simple as that, and real. A lot of those gestures aren’t real, whereas this was sorting it out the way we always sort things out.

Well, it was similar with Vicki. Small steps without a grand design at the end of it, no big decision or question that needed answering, just an inevitable drift towards a special relationship, and a complicated one at that.

The biggest complication which was present right from the start was that this wasn’t a closed relationship. My husband and me both wanted to fuck other people (with full knowledge and consent), indeed often us both fucking the same person. Neither of us wanted to give that prize up when we brought Vicki into the family, and so it was some relief when Vicki agreed to apply our rules to all three of us.

It sounds somewhat more formal than it actually is. All we say is that all three in the group agrees to one or more of the group fucking someone else (someone specific on a person by person basis). We also have rules about sexual protection and tests that we all apply but given these are planned fucks (for demisexual reasons) and not random fucks, often things can be done to allow safe bareback (a preference for all three of us).

It has to be said that although the three of us had different paths to where we are now, the one thing we all had in common was lots and lots of bareback sex. Right through university (or before), through professional careers, all three of us enjoyed a lot of bareback sex, and we were lucky. Very lucky. None of us got any nasty STDs, and there were no pregnancies involved. In these days where you can get STD check-ups on a routine basis, there is now a lot less risk, and when demisexuality means you need to know someone rather than picking them up in a bar, you get a chance to plan and do tests in advance.

When it was just my husband and me, we planned to have people we could both fuck (hence Vicki), and we were always looking for the illusive man we could both fuck. I have to admit we didn’t really think anyone would turn into a full polyamorous partner, but such is our emotional attachment to Vicki that it was inevitable. But our intention wasn’t to find one person to fuck, it was to find a number. What happened with Vicki was very much not part of the plan.

Fundamentally, this is the continuation with a process that began ages ago, as my husband and I began to discuss our sexualities, our desires, our needs, and we realised we wanted to watch other people have sex, and then for us to actually have sex with other people. It has been a brilliant decision, although I realise not a decision that many relationships could take. Ours though has only been enhanced by it.

Although for me, Vicki went from being about sex to being about love. I think it is the increase in the amount of love I could give and receive that makes the situation appealing to me, especially as my nuclear family is toxic and we have little to do with them – the idea of a loving extended family, all of whom contribute to the whole is something many people have and I never have – it has always been about me and my husband, and here it was potentially being about someone else as well. Once I had put away the notion that in loving Victoria, I would reduce my love for my husband in some way, there were only positives for me.

I remember with fondness the day I told Vicki that I loved her. One weekend, when Vicki was down for her fourth weekend in a row (unusual in itself). My husband wasn’t home yet, and I was lying on the floor with Vicki’s cunt firmly planted on my mouth. My tongue was firmly probing her folds and tasting her delicious flavour, and I was staring lovingly up past her mound, her stomach, and her tits to her sweet face, which had gone from smiling to focussing on what my tongue was up to.

After I made her cum for the fourth time, she looked down into my eyes, with a twinkle and what looked like lots of love, and she asked me what I was thinking. She lifted her cunt off my mouth enough for me to speak, that brief pause was all I had to decide whether to go for it. I told her that I loved her and wanted to be able to do this virtually every day rather than a couple of times a month. 

Her smile slightly broadened as she lowered her cunt back down, saying she would like that, before mischievously adding that I needed the practice. Cheeky bitch.

But it was out there, and she hadn’t run away. As I was licking her cunt, I was thinking about how things may develop. It did at least provoke thoughts and start discussions, but the reality was that we were drifting towards polyamory anyway. Fundamentally, we did all feel the same, and whilst nobody wanted to move quickly, the direction of travel was pretty clear, and it wasn’t far from what I imagined.

We all know there will be more. As inevitably as fucking Vicki, there will be others. But we have the framework in place and are all totally on board. What amazing people they both are. What an amazing relationship we all have. And I know the best is yet to come.