What happened to me over the winter has led me to realise what powerful tools we have in sexual activity, distraction techniques, orgasms, and even carefully selected pain in dealing with the things that ail me.

The clues have been there for some time. I’ve mentioned before how much my mental health suffers if I don’t have enough sex, so sex and orgasms certainly improve my mental wellbeing.

I think it is well known that having orgasms during your period can often help to significantly reduce period pain and can shorten your period. It certainly did both with me, to such an extent that I had to have orgasms many times a day whilst I was bleeding purely for pain management.

I’ve also never understood why women say they have a headache as an excuse to get out of sex. I’ve always found that sex and orgasms normally take the edge off my headache, even if it is the type of headache that hasn’t responded to medication.

Throughout our relationship, my husband and I have deployed sexual activity to manage my anxiety (which only flares up occasionally now but used to be really bad). My childhood meant that I was always anxious, especially about friendships and sexual relationships. That was particularly acute in the early days of my relationship with my now-husband, and I mentioned it one day when he was at work. He suggested I put my comfortable (yet sizable) butt plug in, sat in my really soft teddy bear dressing gown, and imagined he was wrapped around me hugging me with his cock in my ass.

When he got in, I was somewhat less anxious, but he thought he could do better. He sat naked on the settee, with me getting his cock hard with my hands, whilst he removed the butt plug and lubed up my asshole again. Then, I lowered myself onto his cock, him guiding it into my awaiting asshole. I realised that I had the butt plug in my asshole for the longest I ever had, so when he removed it, my asshole was gaping a little. It made his cock entering me rather easy.

He wrapped his arms round me, grabbing a good handful of tit in each hand, thereby completing the cocooned feeling. I was in bliss, and what was left on my anxiety fell away.

He roughly kneaded, groped, and squeezed my tits, which he knows I love, and when I felt his cock lose just a little of its structural integrity, he started to rock a little, just to bring his cock back to complete hardness.

Once his rocking was no longer enough, I started to ride him. I was in Anal Reverse Cowgirl, so I was in charge of how deep he got, and after me riding him got his cock growing again, he got very deep. He was still holding on to my tits and my movements were making them twist and drag which only heightened my excitement, and his growing just before he came was the last straw and I had a very rare orgasm with no cunt contact.

Since then, wearing the butt plug when I’m a little anxious invokes those and other good memories and therefore calms me down. I guess it works the same way as a comfort blanket, something familiar that you can feel the physical sensation on your body, with a link to good memories and feelings.

I’ve also found that a butt plug helps to reduce stress by distracting you with its physical presence (because you can always feel it in). For example, good feelings interrupt the build-up of anger and frustration, thereby keeping me calm.

But the biggest evidence to support this has been recently in the early stages of coming off gluten. I had tremendous pain deep inside the bones of my shoulders and the painkillers I had didn’t touch it. It turns out that my bone pain was due to my lack of nutrient absorption when I was glutened, so when I started taking supplements, the bones hurt from suddenly absorbing a glut of nutrients. My husband tried massage on me, but as it wasn’t tissue pain that had little effect. So, he suggested he try to distract me with some sex and some orgasms.

His cock filled my cunt for a while, and that brought a smile to my face, yet it wasn’t enough. So, after he’d cum, he got my wand, set it to maximum power, revealed my clit from inside its protective cocoon and applied the wand to it. My body instinctively tried to twist away from the wand, yet he managed to hold me in place and brought me to a hard orgasm. The relief from pain was fabulous, but after a few minutes, the pain started to come back. I told him I wanted another orgasm but was much more wriggly than last time.

He stopped after a bit of wriggling and loaded me into Victoria’s under bed restraints. I had never used them before (although he had used them with Vicki, as she loves them). I had always been very wary of restraints, but I agreed this time because I needed the orgasms, and I knew as my clit got more tender, I would wriggle harder to get away, even though my brain desperately wanted the orgasms.

My legs were wide apart and my arms slightly so, cuffed to the headboard. He turned the wand on and quite firmly applied it to my clit. My body tried to twist away, but it couldn’t get away and my poor clit was now solely dependent on his mercy for some relief, and that mercy wasn’t forthcoming. Over the course of the evening, I had orgasm after orgasm, each one giving my pain a little relief. My clit was the most swollen and engorged that I’ve ever seen it, yet the distraction and orgasms did their job, and for a few hours, my deep pain was significantly reduced. And I have to admit that I enjoyed not being able to escape the wand.

But there comes a point where a girl can’t orgasm again for a while. I was still in pain, so he thought of another distraction technique, and that was a good hard sustained spanking. My brain seems to only be able to focus on one source of pain at a time, so his theory was that if he spanked or paddled my ass enough, my brain will switch from deep bone pain to my spanked ass pain.

I was desperate for pain relief that worked, so I gave it a go. As he started spanking me, I felt the sensations of flesh meeting flesh, but any pain was drowned out. He quickly moved on to the soft side of the paddle and then the hard side, focussing on his favourite up and under stroke. He thought that focussing on one spot would maximise the pain I felt, and it was the pain that was important.

After a few dozen strokes with the hard side, I realised that my ass was feeling rather painful, but at the same time, the bone pain had really subsided. The tactic was clearly working, and I find the pain of a well spanked ass very pleasurable. He carried on paddling my ass, and it really fucking hurt, but my shoulders didn’t, and it allowed me to get to sleep, enjoying the throbbing in my ass rather than in my shoulders.

He repeated things the following day with similar success, and the day after, the shoulder pain was subsiding, so these techniques weren’t necessary. These techniques definitely work for me though and will be deployed again in the future. Sex isn’t just for fun and babies.